Oftentimes, When I find myself in times of trouble (Paul McCartney much?), I just shutdown myself and breakdown.

Like a lot. A lot, lot, lot! It’s been like that for quite some time. In many instances, I’ll just cook ramen and think about things that I know I should, but alas, the mighty intrusive thoughts have won. Imagine about thinking about how peaceful could it be if you can have the opportunity to unalive yourself, permanently. Or if somehow if I can get a lot of money, maybe all my problems can be solved! Or thinking that if I am dead, many of our problems would not exist, causing them to have improved familiar relations with one another.

You know, the usual stuffs, for me I guess. I know it, the irony is not lost with. That’s highy problematic. It really it. Not only it is on borderline sadboyism, it omit toxic qualities that no one except someone who’s crazy would be fucking fine with that! I have now changed, since then.

It started at my first year of college. They were hesitant to interact, nevertheless, problematic codes have found a way for us to bond. Solving their C and Java codes were not easy, but it was good funthat I have. That’s the catalyst, I think. 2nd year was… Let’s just say the half of it was a shitty experience. Especially the 2nd semester. I was crying most of the time. While there are many silver linings on that A.Y., that was not enough to mask the bruises.

During those times, they were there for me. In fucked-up moments and in happy hours, they were there for me. I can’t help but be thankful for them. They helped me in many things that I cannot say.

This is for them.

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#include <iostream>

int main(int argc, char** argv) {
    std::cout << "Thank you, really. I have no words. Thank you." << std::endl;

    return 0;
}

Note: I am using they/them pronouns to further mask their identities.